Celebrations

Is it that weird that my family and I don't really celebrate anything from xmas, Thanksgiving to birthdays? I feel like most people don't know what to say to me after I tell them this. They instantly become mute and wonder what I'll be having for dinner or if I ever have received any presents. When I was younger, we used to celebrate my birthday with the New Year celebration, since they are only a few days apart. I'm not sure how we stopped doing that but we did. Maybe it was after my sister and I moved away to college.

So my birthday is coming up and I will be getting that day off. My friends are more concerned about it than I am. This is not a complaint and I do appreciate that they care for me. Thank you. You know what I dislike about birthdays the most is when people demand for gifts or expect you to plan things for them. Gifts are not mandatory. Also having a wish list doesn't mean that these are the only things that your friends can get you. I actually don't really like the concept of a wish list, but I can see how it can be useful for some people.

Happy winter! Love this weather.

Morning Driving Thoughts

Do you have reoccurring thoughts while driving? Or play mind games to make the drive more bearable during traffic hours or on empty freeways? I imagine possible collision scenarios. They calm me down when certain things on the road make me nervous. Id est driving between two big rigs. So this morning while a school bus was on my left and a big rig on my right, I thought what would happen if they were to suddenly merge into one another. Would the top portion of my car get sliced off or crushed leaving me underneath one of them? One of my friend was in an accident a few months ago involving a big rig merging into her lane. Her car horn didn't alarm the other driving leaving her to merge right into the space underneath the big rig. All of the her windows shattered, but she came out amazingly undamaged. I can't imagine that my little Ford Focus would protect me as well as her BMW, but I still would like to know what my possible damage would be.

Rubik Cube and Age

Current obsessions: Antique wrist watches and Men's shoes. One is too expensive for me to own and the other is too big for me to wear. Nothing ever fits right. That's always the story.

I saw a Rubik cube the other day and fixed the first row, but got stuck on the second. Can't believe that I completely went blank on how to solve the rest of it. It was very disappointing. I promised myself that I would never forget it because one of my friend was doubting me when I was trying to learn how to solve it from a youtube video.

Have you ever heard about the age dating rule of half your age plus 7? It's this rule of the oldest/youngest age that you should date. So if you're 27, you would take (27/2) + 7 = 20.5 youngest age. For oldest age you would take 27 + (27/2) = 40.5 yrs. old. I personally have never been with/dated anyone beyond + or - 5 years of my age. I'm not against the age dating rule, I just have never been in a position where I had to think twice about someone's age before. Is age really just a number to you?


Cuties on Halloween

Quality of Friendship

What matters to you more, how many friends you have or the quality of the friendships that you have? I hope yours would be quality over quantity. Building a friendship is hard. With some people you meet, it's instant; whereas the rest may need time to grow. Sometimes you meet people who you think are extremely nice to you to find out that they have other intentions. It's hard to weed these out sometimes. It's unfair to both when one feels more for the other, but is there ever a relationship where two people can feel equally the same for each other? How do you be friendly without being too friendly? How do you care for someone without making them feel like you want more? How do you hang out with people because you want to go out, without making them feel like they're the only people you want to be with?

I went to a birthday dinner six hours ago. It made me think about who I'd want to invite if I were to have my own celebration. So many people are so far away. I miss you. I appreciate and am grateful for my low maintenance friends who understand that we're all busy and that we don't need to talk daily to remain good friends. It just isn't necessary and it's not high school anymore. I wish I have a recording of one of those high school days conversations. I don't know what my friends and I used to talk about anymore, but we would be on the phone for hours...or has something happened to me where I can no longer just speak forever and freely?


California Science Center

Taking a Basic Headshot

Some people just have no idea what to do when they're behind a camera and I know... it's not completely their fault. They just need more practice and some guidance. It bugs me when I get bad headshots from people for any print materials. These pictures are supposed to make you look better not worse. If you're not an artsy type of person, don't go for the weird angle pose. It supposed to represent you and not someone else. So here are a few tips for you to keep in mind if you need it for taking the MOST BASIC headshot.

1) What is a headshot? Remember that it's a picture of someone's head. So don't experiment with cutting off any parts of their ears, neck, head, etc.

2) Lighting: make sure that you're in a well lit place, but not so bright that your subject's forehead is glowing.

3) Size: yes, the size of a person's head matters. Make sure that you're not too far or too close to your subject. You only need the upper portion of the body. If you have more then that's too much. Just from the top of the head to the chest area is enough. Leave some background space in the picture, too. You don't want to make it look like there's no room between your subject and the frame of the image. They need space.

4) Surrounding: make sure there isn't any weird objects behind your subject's head. Try to take the picture in front of an empty wall, but preferably a wall color that isn't the same color as their skin color. It's good to have contrast between the subject and the background color.

5) Eye contact: Focus on the subject and make sure the subject have eye contact with the camera. You don't want them to look lost, confuse, sad, etc. Make them feel confident, happy, and positive.

6) Focus: if you have shaky hands, use a tripod or rest the camera against something.

7) Quantity: always take more pictures than you need and check the image if you can so you don't have to re-shoot later.

8) Image size: most places will ask for 300+ dpi image. If you don't know what this mean, just pick one of the larger size setting on the camera instead of the smallest.

9) Good luck and have fun.

Back From Peru

Peru was amazing! Having a vacation is awesome. It was definitely hard to come back and I didn't really want to. Well, does anyone ever want to leave their vacations? I don't think so...unless you lost everything and really can't come back. Actually, on my back at the airport in Lima, this guy at the counter next to me lost his bank card and didn't have enough money to pay for the airport tax so they couldn't issue him his plane ticket. I wonder whatever happened to him.

I wish I were an explorer or something. Actually, I rather be a world photographer. I just want to travel the world and photograph it. Not sure who will buy it, but that is my dream job. So why am I not doing that? Well, I am kinda...slowly building up my portfolio of pictures from around the world. I think I'm going to go to Italy next or India. Anyways, can't believe I saw a SLOTH! There were also Uros floating islands, Machu Picchu, and the freaking Amazon Rainforest. I can't believe that I was finally there.

We rode this little boat to Monkey Island where there wasn't any type of security at all. We just jumped out of the boat and walked up the sand and into the jungle where wild monkeys were hanging out. We had to rush out after the alpha monkey came out though. You don't want to upset an alpha monkey, you just don't know how they'll fight you. Hmm..what would I do if a monkey were to attack me? I think I would probably try to kick it first, but it'll probably just jump on me, so kicking would be no use. I would probably have to bite it or something. Why am I talking about this?

I am way overdue on all of my phone calls to my friends up North. I'm sorry. I'll call and answer all e-mails soon.

Currently listening to Somewhere Else by Razorlight


Colca Canyon


Taquile Island


Cusco


Madre de Dios

Hola From Peru!

Right now Im on the 6th floor of a hotel in Puno. Sasha and I arrived to Peru about 5 days ago. I have been taking DMG, one in the morning and one at night, to prevent altitude sickness, but I still get headaches on the back side of my head...or maybe they are from all the bus rides, Im not sure. Sorry for the lack of apostrophes here, the keyboard here is a little bit different and I just cant seem to figure out how to use it.


It seems like most places that Ive been so far always have a square infront of a church. The first day was spent in Lima. Its definitely different to travel with a tour group instead of on your own. Everything is already taken care of from bus rides to here and there, but your time is limited and you are on someone elses schedule instead of your own. People here are very friendly so far, but I have been warned to carry my purse in the front and to watch where Im going.


Already, there are over 600 pictures on my camera. Everything here is so fastinating to me from what people wear to the architecture of each town. Poverty is also very visible here and I cant believe some of the landscapes that I am seeing here, which express how little I know about this country. I wish that I could upload the pictures now, but that will just have to wait until I get back.

So Much Fun at the Hollywood Bowl

Finally, I was at the Hollywood Bowl or what many Angelenos refer to as the Bowl. It started out with the New Pornographers, Tegan and Sara ( most excited for) then Death Cab for Cuties with the LA Philharmonic. To top it off, they ended the show with unexpected firework. This venue is awesome because it's completely outdoor and you can bring whatever you want to eat and drink there. The weather was perfect and no mosquitos were in sight. I don't know why I waited so long to go here. I love the whole picnic scene before the show.Can't wait to go back. Let's go!


That's Tegan and Sara


Behind Me

Shoo Weird Neighbor, Don't Bother Me!

A couple of weeks ago, one of my guy neighbor started greeting me when he sees me walking to my car in the morning. He keeps asking me the same question about whether or not I fixed my flat tire. And of course it's fixed because my flat tire incident happened about two months ago. He's obviously is not a good listener or has a very bad memory. Ok, I sound mean here and I guess he's just trying to be friendly or wants to get to know his neighbors better or something.

Anyways, the other night I got home quite late around 2 or 3 A.M. It was completely dark and my front light was out. While walking to my door, I thought I heard someone but didn't stop to pay attention. When I got to my door, I heard a guy saying something like, "Oh, it's you. I'm just walking home. What's your name again?" It took me a while to realize that he's the same neighbor, but what the hell? I was so weird out by this.

Everyone should know not to approach a stranger when it's late and dark. Also, it's not like my place is on his way. Why don't people know when it's appropriate to say hello to someone or not? When it's dark and someone is trying to open the door, just leave them alone. I thought I was going to get attacked by someone or something. Man, you don't even know of all the ways I was thinking of how I could defend myself before I realized who he is. But still, I have no idea who he is other than where he lives.


Yummmm
Bottega Louie, Los Angeles, CA

On the Way to Fresno

The Saturday after the Day of the Decision on Prop. 8 on May 10th to be exact, there was a rally/march in Fresco for the Meet in the Middle 4 Equality campaign. I shared the bus organized by the Latino Equality Alliance (LEA) with 54 other riders from other orgs. (such as Bienestar, The Wall, Love, Honor, Cherish, Somos Familia, Honor Pac, Stonewall Young Democrats, Rainbow Pride Youth, and Gamba Adisa Quilombo). Several people have gone to Camp Courage so they decided to share their amazing stories with us.

So why meet in Fresno? Well, the gap between Yes vs. No on Prop 8: Same-sex Marriage Ban was about 4.4% or 526,095 voters, which is basically a size of a town like Fresno. It was time to unite outside of our safe zone and spread awareness that the queer communities and allies are everywhere and that Civil Rights is not something that people should be allowed to vote on and take away from others. It's discrimination just like how interracial dating/marriage wasn't allowed before, immigrants couldn't own lands or become citizens, womyn couldn't vote, the color of your skin determined where you sit on a bus, taxation without representation, Foreign Miner's Tax, etc. "This Too Shall Pass."

Before that Saturday, I really thought that we would be celebrating in Fresno. On the Day of the Decision, I rushed to work trying to listen to the hearing on the radio, but I was too late. Everywhere online were already displaying the headline "Court Upheld Prop. 8." That made me really sad and upset. I didn't feel like working at all. I am glad to hear that at least the court recognizes the 18,000 couples that have already gotten married, but it's completely unfair how much rights differences that people now have within a year time span.

Sadly, I have waited way too long to share their stories...so all the details are not as clear anymore, but I'll try my best to summarize them.

One man's story was about how he never thought that he would fall in love with someone who's HIV+, but he did. His partner lived in Mexico where HIV/AIDS medicines and resources are not as accessible than in the U.S. Because same-sex couples cannot sponsor their partners to residency, this man wasn't able to help his partner to better medical care here, which would have most likely extended his life. Unfortunately, his partner passed away last year. This is why he's fighting. Please support United American Families Act.

Another man shared a story about how when he was younger, he always wanted to grow up, be happy and get married. His mom always told him that anything is possible in America. Now that he's older, he realized that what his mom told him isn't true because he can't get married. Ok, there's more to this story but the point is that the idea of growing up and getting married is the root to every fairy tales. Why can't everyone have the same rights to express their love in marriage? Why have all of this hate and create barriers between one another?

One womyn shared that her parents sent her to "straight" school after they found out about her. Obviously, it didn't work. Her parents should ask for a refund.

Another person shared his coming out story. At first, he kept waiting for a good time to come so he could tell his mom. But the economy crisis came instead so he kept on waiting. Finally, one day he took his mom out to a casino where she won some money. She was so happy that he though that maybe this is the good time that he has been waiting for so he decided to tell her. His mom said that she knew and that she's happy that he finally told her.


"Hope will never be silent"--Harvey Milk

Traveling with Someone New

This year, my friend S and I decided to travel together to South America. We have been talking about it since college. Over the weekend, I came into a realization that we had a few differences in our ideas of a vacation. So I advise you to ask yourself and anyone who you'll be traveling with, these questions before you decide to do anything. This way, it's clear from the start what both of you want and expect from the trip.

1) What is your idea of a vacation?
2) What do you plan to do and not do?
3) How do you like to travel? Bus, Train, Walk, Hitchhike, etc.
4) How adventurous are you while traveling?
5) What's your budget for food, hotel, etc.?
6) How much recovery time do you need after the trip?
7) How much time will you have to prepare for the trip?
8) What can you help plan for the trip and by when?
9) Will you have time to help plan the trip?
10) Do you prefer to explore on your own or go with a tour group?


Day of Decision Rally, Hollywood, CA.

Do You Have an Expiration Date for Your Friendship?

I can still remember that phone conversation clearly. It must have been about 5-7 years ago since then that I felt completely confused and disappointed about a certain friendship.

After being away in college for a year, I made a phone call that summer to an old friend from high school. I knew that I should have tried to make an effort to keep in touch with her sooner because we were quite close before. But a friendship takes two and that was our first phone call. I remember that I happily shared things with her about my first year in college, but when it came time for her to share, she went quiet. She simply said that she felt like I was now a complete stranger and that it would be too much to explain. So what can you say to something like that? I was speechless. I apologized and told her that I'm sorry that she felt that way and how things turned out. Inside I felt like part of me was crushing. I never thought that her idea of friendship would be so different from my own.

Sure, time can weaken a relationship, but I don't think that it can completely erase the experiences and memories with someone into complete strangers. Or at least this is how it is for me. Life takes you to different places and you get lost sometimes with certain people. But when our paths do cross again, these moments make me happy that we've found one another again no mater how long it may have been. And even if our paths were to never cross, I would never think of them as a complete stranger. I would say that was my friend from .....whatever that is.

Maybe I'm just low maintenance when it comes to friendships. I don't need to constantly hang out or talk to someone on a weekly/monthly/etc. schedule. And if you need this from me then it would probably annoy the hell out of me that you'd even expect this unless you're going through tough times or something then I would of course be there for you. We'll talk and hang out when we can.


Friendship in the middle of the Dessert

A Little Bit of Echo Park

What I saw one Saturday morning in Echo Park, CA.

Office Experiment

One of my co-worker saw this magic show on TV, where a magician brings a frozen fly back to life, so he decided to see if he could do the same. Later, I found this fly in one of our ice trays (I know, ewww!) and told him that he was lucky because I just found a fly for his experiment. It turned out that he put it there, so I thought, why wait...let's see if it's true.

So he took out the fly and tried to warm it in his hands and fingers. That didn't work. He blew some air into his hands. That didn't work. Then I tried my own experiment and put a paper towel over a cup of hot water to see if the steam could heat up the fly. That didn't work. So yeah, if you have ever been curious, now you know. This is a myth. It does not work!


It's Alive!

Abandoned Car

What a sight. Found this car in a parking lot near my work today. Everything that could possibly be taken was gone including the seats and stereo. I feel bad for the unknown owner. As the economy get worse, I feel like the increase in unemployment will drive more people to commit crimes and do other things that they may not normally do just to get by. I'm not saying that you have to be unemployed to be a thief, but I think that you're more likely to steal when you can't afford things...other than that, you're just plain greedy.

Snacks at Work. Good or Bad?

I think that it's great that my work provides snacks and occasional lunch and desserts. To me, it's a way for the company to show their employees that they think of them. These may not be the healthiest things to munch on while you're at work, but they can't cater to everyone's personal diet. Besides, you're not forced to eat them. So if you do gain weight then it's all your own fault for lack of discipline.


Would You Snack on These?

Less Traffic + Jaelyn

Driving to and from work has been so much more enjoyable these past couple of weeks due to the decrease in traffic. It's quite sad actually if you were to really think about it. Less people are driving now because they're out of a place to drive to for work. I also noticed that when I was at the store the other day, most people were only buying the essentials like toothpaste, shampoo and detergent and not so much of things like clothes and books. People are saving more because they're running low on cash. There are now more people holding signs along the streets in clean and dirty clothes. The recent layoff waves is effecting everyone without any discrimination. You can be a top designer or the teacher of the year and it would still doesn't matter. I'm scared for my friends who are without jobs and have bills to pay. I wish I were a billionaire so I could help them out. I feel a little bit guilty sharing ideas of going to places when I know that they can't join me. I'm sure that many friendships must have been broken by now between the haves and have-nots.

On a brighter note, Congratulations to one of my best friend, Mong, who recently gave birth this morning to a healthy baby girl, Jaelyn : ) Welcome to the family. You'll have so much love in your life.


9th Month

In Less than 90 Days...

I don't understand how some people who preach for freedom can have such strong drive to still control the way others live their lives. I can see how someone can be pro-life even though I am pro-choice, but how can someone not allow someone else to get married? It's already hard enough to find love and to have it reciprocated, but now you have to worry whether your own government will recognize it, too? This is ridiculous.

A civil union is not the same as a marriage and if you were to say that it is then why don't we get rid of marriage all together? So in less than 90 days, we will find out the real result of Prop.8. If you missed the oral argument from 3/5/09, you can watch it on The California Channel. No matter what the outcome is, know that the struggle will continue.




L.A. Pride

Great Deals

Found two antique watches in a box of old jewelry at the Rose Bowl flea market the other Sunday. Everything was $4/each, but the seller ended up giving them to me for $5. Score! Found out that one of them is actually a winding watch that I would have to wind daily. For some weird reasons, this idea excites me.


Love the Elastic Band
I used to have a watch with the elastic band like this back in high school, but someone stole it. So mean!

Insert Happy Music Here

What a good weekend I had. No, it wasn't because the Steelers won, since I didn't even know who they were up to about two weeks ago. One of the highlight was just connecting with different people without that weird vibe that they just want to get with you. So I marched with the API Equality group at the Chinatown Lunar New Year Golden Dragon parade this year (I know, what a long name). About one hundred people were expected, but two hundreds people actually showed up. What was amazing about it was that a bunch of non API LGBT groups like Love Honor Cherish also came out to show support. There was definitely a lot of love all around and there wasn't any booing from the spectators at all. One of the funniest thing that happened there was that many little kids would scream out "Yeah, rainbow!" as we walked by and I could see the faces of some of the parents looking a little bit worried right afterward.

Also got myself a new plant for my room, free breakfast at Ikea, a gift from a friend, and a possible new place to hang out at.


I love duck meat
Thanks P for ordering this delicious dish

I Want

A homeless man asked if I like poetry, so I told him yes. He was happy because he said that I was the first person that day who told him that. He asked if he could write me a poem in exchange for some type of donation and I agreed. He asked me what I would like him to write about, so I told him to write about whatever he wanted. And this is what he wrote to me:


Poetry for Bus Fare
Did you know that it costs $60 for a monthly bus pass now?

What is Frogafish: random thoughts?

So someone recently asked me what my blog is about and there was no better way to describe it other than that this is the place where I share some of my thoughts, usually reflecting on my recent activities. I definitely don't share what I do each day and there's no rule to what I need to share here except that everything here is something that I don't mind sharing with the public. So yes, this blog is not me, it's simply a part of me...like all other blogs out there.

I met a lot of friendly and interesting people this weekend. Mingling is definitely something that I'm not good at, but I can do it when I have to. It helps when you look kinda friendly so people won't just walk away from you when they see you coming. I really appreciate those people who go out of their ways to make newcomers feel welcome to their groups of friends. Thanks!

Here are some long overdue pictures that I have been wanting to upload:


Would you like a cup of tea?
Rose Parade


Castledoor


Earl Greyhound


The Queen Mary
Free admission to CA residents for the month of January.

Let's Go Yum Cha and Stop the War

I wonder what others' experience with Dim Sum is like, but for me it's something that I used to do every Sunday morning with my Dad. We would go "Yum Cha," which means "Drink Tea" in Chinese. Sunday was family day and back then it was my Dad's only day off for the week.

We always get only hot tea and never cold water. Never any fried food and only steamed dishes. No jello or anything that has bright colors and the only dessert is usually between the egg tart and the custard bun.

The oldest person there always start the meal and we used to go really early in the morning to avoid the crowd and like my dad used to tell me, Yum Cha is breakfast.

Anyways, there was a rally here in LA today to stop the war against the Palestinian People. I wanted to go, but have already made prior plans, so I didn't. For those of you who have ever been to a rally, I support and thank you for your passion to go out and express what you believe in. It's good to have passion and stand up for something. To be able to feel and be moved. And for those who have never been to a rally, it's never too late and yes, I know, there are other ways to show support, too. And it doesn't mean that you're less passionate about it or anything, it just mean that you couldn't go.

So where do I stand in this rally, for or against the war? Well, I'm against the war of course. But I fully support the fight against any oppressors of the innocents, people who can't choose what they look like, what religion or living environments they were born into, people who are not in the right condition to protect themselves and especially people who does not want to fight, but are forced to live in constant war and fear. I wonder if we'll ever see the time when there will be no such thing as war. It will be something that kids would have to look up in their dictionary or something.

What frustrates me the most is how I can't understand how someone who have seen their people or know of their ancestors, who have been oppressed by someone else before, can later become the oppressors themselves or support oppression on someone else. Did they simply forget what that was like?

I hope that the LA rally was peaceful today. There's no need for it to turn into a smoky riot because that is what we're fighting against.


Guess Who?

A Free Day

Did you know...Disneyland is free on your birthday? I didn't let this go to waste of course and went to California Adventure for the first time, yesterday. It's basically a smaller version of Disneyland, but with shorter lines and more space around you. There were definitely enough rides and attractions to keep you entertained for the entire day. So Yeah! I made the right choice.

Happy New Year by the way.

Top 5 rides:
Tower of Terror (Twice!)
The new Toy Story ride (What a hand sore.)
Soarin' Over California (Mmmm...the smell of oranges and the ocean.)
California Screaming (You have to ride this one at night, the view is amazing.)
and ...


The Orange Stinger
Reminds me of the playground where I used to played at when I was younger.

P.S. Thanks to everyone who wished me a happy birthday. It was fun.

Cooking for One

I find myself cooking less these days now that I'm only cooking for myself. Most of the time, I don't even cook anything fancy anymore and when I do, it's always way too much. I feel tired after work and just want to prepare something quick for dinner. One of my roommate cooks the best damn tomato soup that's really sour and she made some today. Yeah! I've also been drinking more Coke than usual, but my rule for soda is to only drink it when I'm out and never buy then store them at home. My current favorite drink right now is a nice cold glass of chrysanthemum tea that you can buy at most Asian markets.

Anyways, I hate fakers. Please don't ever pretend to be something that you're not to impress someone. It's sickening.